Up early this morning.

Before birds.

Before light.

Before brain cells.

There’s early.

And then there’s damned early.

This was damned early.

Pauses quickly to check on when to use damn and when to use damned. Either/or as adjective or adverb. All good. Back to post.

I decided to dress in something that I could wear either at home alone or under public scrutiny.

So far so good.

Then I decided that anything to be worn under public scrutiny needed to be accessorized with a titch of makeup, which for me is a swipe or two of mascara and some lip gloss for I am stunningly beautiful in my natural state, especially damned early.

Which brings us to the word…

Klutz!

Yes. In my case it is spelled with an exclamation point.

I pulled out the magic wand that is mascara and applied it to the left eye. So far, so good. Moving to the right eye, it flew out of my hand, bounced off my striped Oxford shirt in three places, hit the basin leaving smears of dark brown everywhere, and landed brush up in the drain.

Blink, blink.

And this is where I shine with the damned early morning no brain cells.

I took a cosmetic cleaning pad, applied eyeglass cleaner to it, and proceeded to worry away at my shirt until I had this big, wet spot larger than I am endowed. Just sayin’.

It wasn’t pretty.

But it might have been a MacGyver moment.

Because after putting a blower dryer to it, it dried mascara smudge free.

And now I’ved got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart.

Sunday School stays with you forever.

And that’s my sorry tale.

It just needs a dollop of snow to become Nature’s Poutine!

And that’s how we’re doing the first Friday in December.

TGIF.

You know what to do. Meet you in the bar in 3…2…1…

And I’m thinkin’ I’m really going to need that drink meet today.

Elen

Note: The first image is a licensed, royalty-free image from Fotolia.com. No poaching, please.