It’s August, and pretty soon I’ll being looking at the big A as a flashback, as in time’s a wastin’. It’s summer, and there isn’t enough to do already. Right? Not only do we have the indoor chores, but we have those pesky add-ons — outdoor chores. No pressure.
In git-r-done mode, I’ve decided to add an extra indoor and outdoor to this 31-day month.
Outdoor — There are a bunch of fence boards that need replacing — maybe all of them — and the fence needs restaining overall. Mr. G, honey and I will work on this together between cloudbursts. See Elen laughing. I’ll be Gopher Girl and get the runt grunt jobs going along the bottom couple of feet of the fence. Note to self: Don’t forget to scoop the Golden poop. And I’m pretty good safe at demolition or removal. Under no circumstances give me a hammer. I need those thumbs for keyboarding.
Indoor — I have to sand and repaint the window and door trim from a reno job we had done last summer. It’s taken four installs and almost a year to get the right doors, but we won’t go there. I’m not bitter. Not. No. While I’m at it, I might as well give a fresh coat of white glory to the baseboards. Hello sexy kneepads. Somebody get the CP camera.
If I could, I’d get my buddy, Ed The Painter, to do this chore. Ed can make you weep when he paints — he’s so good. The man doesn’t need to put a drop cloth down. Walks out at the end of the day — date ready — without a speck of paint on him. While he works, he whistles a happy tune. Sadly, he retired. No more Ed.
That leaves me. Elen The Terrible. You could seal my house in drop cloths, and I’d still paint outside the lines. Oh, sure. It begins shiny enough. New brushes. Stir sticks. Drip guards. Fresh drop cloths. Positive mental attitude. Turbo the tunes, and I’m good to go. One with the paint.
By the end of the day — I am the paint. I start out in pristine flip-flops. When they get too sticky, I become the barefoot contessa. I have paint on my nose, paint on my clothes, paint in my hair, paint everywhere. Okay. That’s just a bit too Dr. Seuss, but you get the idea. I’d do better to put it in a paintball gun and shoot it out.
Secret. I love painting. I adore painting. I find it soothing — a plotter’s dream. I love to roll it. Brush it. Sponge it. Comb it…. I just need a little extra — to wear. I’ll try to keep the smudges off this blog.
So. Time’s a wastin’. Don’t think it’s what June Carter Cash had in mind.
p.s. The compromise between Space Chimps and Wanted on Date Night Friday was Hancock. Charlize Theron made the movie for me. I’d like a Mary moment.
Whew! I barely made it under the Tuesday wire.