Humpity Day: Back at the Optometrist…

Fairy Roses!

These are the pink fairy roses in the frontscape. Well, this is a mini view of them. They run the length of the drive and stand 2 1/2 feet tall and about 3 feet wide. They are glorious.

This click was taken three days ago. They will look like this into November even with snow on the ground. They never get old for me.

Yes. You’ve seen them before. Likely, you’ll see them again.

Back at the Optometrist ~

I managed to pass the evil puffer machine test, but the retinal scan was just short of a total fail.

They’ve got a new machine.

Step 1 – Rest your eye in a soft rubber circle and try to mash your face forward just enough to see a green circle form. Green is Go. Green is good. Blue is cold. Not enough pressure. Red is hot. Too much. Back up! Back up! Green is just right. It felt a little Goldilocksian. That rubber circle is a drama queen.

Step 2 – Hold your eye wide open. The technician says, Okay. Here it comes. Keep that eye open wide. Don’t blink! A blinding light flashes in your eye and you hear… You blinked. Of course, I blinked. A solar flare erupted in my eye.

Step 3 – Repeat Step 2 eleventy-hundred times. Blink. Start to giggle, because you are remembering the blog you just posted that morning.

Blink, blink, blink!

Step 4 – The technician TAPES your eyelid open. And Step 2 recommences. Total fail. I can blink with my eyelid taped open. It must be a super power.

We repeated this with the other eye. The outcome was the same. Blink.

Okay, she said. Let’s just move on to the pressure test. And then she sighed.

I told the optometrist what I thought of the stupid super duper new machine. I can do that. We’ve been together a long time. Did I mention that my eyes are really sensitive to light. Yep, that too. Light and air.

Long story short, we managed to get just enough for his purposes. I’m sure he had to extrapolate from a single point of imagery.

As I booked next year’s appointment with the technician I said that we must have gotten enough, because I wasn’t getting a refund on the retinal scan. Also, they should stock up on Gorilla Tape before my next appointment.

Here be Hump Day.

Shuffle right along to Thursday.


4 thoughts on “Humpity Day: Back at the Optometrist…

  1. Remember years ago when we got our picture taken outside, you always had to have the sun shining in your face. I’m pretty sure I don’t have a single picture with my eyes open. The best you got was a severe squint with tears pouring down my face. That light sensitivity is a bugger!

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